Warrior Mom, when is the last time you had a date, a REAL date with your husband? When is the last time you sat down at a restaurant and took the time to gaze into each other’s eyes and talk about something other than the kids or work? When is the last time you went for a walk together and talked about hopes and dreams, vacations you’d like to go on, friends you’d like to get together with? Be honest, when is the last time that you felt loved, valued and romantic toward your husband?

If you can’t answer these questions, it’s ok, don’t despair. This is meant to be a gentle jog to your memory, a gentle reminder of happy times when you were dating or early in your relationship or marriage. Happy times when all you could think about was seeing your beloved, talking with them, holding them. You get the drift. And guess what, it’s not too late to figure out how to go back to some of these amazing feelings and resurrect some time together. If it’s been a while, you may find that it’s tough to think about what to talk about and can be too easy to drift back to conversations about the kids and work. Resist! You can do it!

Parents of special needs children need to dateWhen you were single, dating was a time to explore each other’s hope and dreams. It was time to get away and laugh, talk and have fun together. You took time to learn more about each other, about your past and your dreams for the future. Now that you’re married, you need to do the same thing! You need to take time for your relationship – time to be just a couple, not JUST mom and dad. Dating helps you to keep things fresh and to continue to get to learn more about each other.  Dating takes time, effort and planning. Kids, older parents, work, and children with special needs cause all kinds of distractions that can get in the way and prevent you from getting that necessary alone time with your spouse. Resist! Make plans to be with your spouse. You deserve a happy marriage and your children deserve happy parents.

My husband and I are fortunate to have weekly dates during the summer when we have a plethora of babysitters available to help watch our kids. Once our college students go back to school it’s not so easy and we find several weeks and even a whole month going by without the opportunity to have a date. And now that we’ve passed the Christmas holiday season my husband and I are both thinking that we need to go back to getting out and getting some time alone. It’s important to stay connected, to keep the lines of communication open, and with Valentine’s Day coming up, one of the so called most romantic days of the year – what are you doing to get some alone time with your sweetie?

Here are some ideas for conversation starters during your next date. These ideas will help you learn more about your spouse and also keep off the topic of kids and work.

  1. If you could go anywhere in the world where would it be?
  2. If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be and why?
  3. Where would you like to go on our next vacation?
  4. What is your happiest childhood memory?
  5. If you could travel back through time, what single mistake would you correct in life?

And my favorite question to encourage both my husband and children, “What are five affirmations we can give about each other?”

For more ideas on question to ask your spouse go to the following:

  • https://zachterry.wordpress.com/2009/10/07/50-questions-to-ask-your-spouse-on-a-date-night/
  • http://www.marcandangel.com/2009/07/13/50-questions-that-will-free-your-mind/

Please share your thoughts with us in the comments section below.

And check out these books for more thought-provoking questions:

  • The Book of Questions – http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=marandang-20&l=as2&o=1&a=0894803204
  • If… (Questions For The Game of Life) – http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=marandang-20&l=as2&o=1&a=0679445358
  • The Complete Book of Questions: 1001 Conversation Starters for Any Occasion – http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=marandang-20&l=as2&o=1&a=031024420X

Please share with other warrior moms.


  1. Reply Lynn

    Thank you so much for the reminder to make sure you’re going on dates with your husband! Very important to keep the lines of communication open! Love your ideas for conversation starters to keep parents on topics besides the kids and work! Nice job! Great ideas and can’t wait to get back on track with at least monthly dates….weekly is a bit aggressive right now, but definitely a goal to work toward!

  2. Reply mike lesinski

    Well said. Keep the romance alive, every last part of it, and enjoy the long happy marriage that others long for and envy but particularly that you and your spouse deserve!

  3. Reply Marina

    Sandra, enjoyed our visit and you look GREAT! I am so glad God has anewresd all of our prayers and you are on the way to recovery and coming home. Way to go ..don’t let anything set you back. Love you .Lonnie

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